Friday, June 16, 2006

Yes, I do own the road


I don't really have much to report. Nothing all that interesting happened tonight. There were no celebrities in my cab and not one person gave me the finger. Of course, the same old out of state drivers pulled the same old idiot moves, which is nothing new, but it made me think some introductions might need to be made. You know, like, "Connecticut, meet the gas pedal," and "Pennsylvania, meet the turn signal," and of course, "New Jersey, meet all of the above, as well as the 'end call' button on your cell phone." It almost seems like these states require their drivers to be either brain dead or a meth head in order to get a license. I'll never understand it.

Oh, and around 2:30 am there was one crazy, possibly drunk, lady in a Nissan Maxima. She pulled up alongside me at a red light and started yelling at me. My window was up so I couldn't really hear what she was saying, but it sounded like she was telling me I was disgusting. I just ignored her, but when the light changed, she veered directly into me, forcing me to swerve into the other lane to avoid getting hit by her.

I still have no idea why she did that. I did nothing to provoke her. But I was sufficiently pissed, so I, in turn, pulled the reactionary asshole move of getting in front of her at the next opportunity and slowing way down, ultimately stopping at the green light. It was late, I was tired, and since business was slowing down, I had nothing better to do. It's not my usual way of handling these things but I couldn't resist the impulse to annoy her for a minute. She was trapped behind me and leaned on the horn, which was somewhat gratifying. But eventually I got bored of that and got away from her.

That was about it by way of excitement for the night.

Earlier in the evening, I saw the best sign ever. It was on this cabbie's rear windshield:

The picture didn't come out very well so you may not be able to read it. The sign says, "Yes, I do own the road." I think I need to get one of these. I'll probably get the finger a lot more that way.

52 comments:

Paradise Driver said...

I'll see if I can make one of those signs up and e-mail it to you.

I'm going to put it on my cab too. :)

Anonymous said...

Its time to change race tracks my sweet. Los Angeles is on your mind. "fit for life" book by harvey and marilyn diamond
begin to eat like california

Unknown said...

I like the cab driver's license frame...

BAF said...

NY-Empire State looks great from Auckland NZ!I stopped for gas on way home and pulling out of station a jerk tried to chop me off getting out - My trusty Rav 4 won. Yeah! however he then overtook me on the inside and then cut in front - the Rav's AB Brakes work well in the wet!!!! Absolute germ of a guy - he looked like he was from the area of the globe where they blow each other up! So 'no fear' all over the globe there are losers on the road. Keep up the good work MP - how's the book coming along?

Sicilian said...

More to blog about. . .
Ciao

Anonymous said...

What you said about Pennsylvania drivers is very accurate. I've lived there all of my life and there are so many people who fail to signal.

Drunken Master said...

It's generally harder to drive in cities, but suburban drivers are surprisingly clueless. Which is why when they hit the city, all hell breaks loose.

High Power Rocketry said...

You always know when you enter NJ, the driving really falls apart.

The Lone Beader® said...

Cabbies in Boston have a tough time, because all of us 'Massholes' think we own the road, too! And, most of us up here don't like to use our 'blinkers' either...LOL!!

ReallyEvilCanine said...

000000 beat me to it; I was hoping to be the first to notice the frame.

Try driving in Europe with all the roundabouts/traffic circles. The only Americans who handle them well are from the DC area. After driving the Swindon Magic Roundabout a couple times, you'll long for 9th Ave. at 5p.m. on Friday.

Dino said...

I like that sign. I have a sticker on my car saying lead, follow or get [the hell] out of the way (its a Marine Corps sticker)

Anonymous said...

I always say that when Pennsies learn to "drive," they are given a NJ Driver's Manual and told to "Just do the opposite of whatever it says in here."

When they finally go to get their license, the test is simply "Do you have a thumb?"

Just one thumb gets you a license, and it doesn't even have to be opposable.

date, no chaser said...

what's worse than the out of state drivers from the tri-state area are the ones from down south or the midwest. i actually saw a van with south carolina plates stop in the middle of the holland tunnel, signal, and attempt to change lanes...

Anonymous said...

Haha, I'm from CT (currently live in Queens), and I agree with the gas pedal thing. My favorite thing to say to slow drivers is stuff like, "Welcome to the interstate, we drive faster here" and "grow a set and step on the f'ing gas," when I'm OBVIOUSLY letting them merge in front of me but they're freaked out because I don't give them 8,000 feet in which to fit their 15-foot long car. Ugh. Funny thing is though, I never actually yell this stuff, I just kind of say it under my breath.

MTM said...

I just moved to Connecticut from Western Mass & CT drivers THINK THEY ALL OWN THE ROAD & even though
there is a NO TALK ON hand held cell phone law NO BODY follows it!
I hate the CT drivers drive, THEY ALL got there licenses from the cracker jack box. Of course people say the same about Mass drivers, so I can't win anywhere! But I think people in CT need to stop acting like their the only ones on the road!

Anonymous said...

I'm a NYC pedestrian and I find the worst offenders of not using signals are cab drivers. True, most of the time I'm trying to cross against the light, but if there is no one coming except for a car that's going to turn instead of enter the intersection, no harm right? I don't take cabs often but would be honored to get you as a driver. I fear the odds are against me.

Anonymous said...

You should try driving in Holmes County, Oh! All the horse and buggies with little of no lights and rarely does one have a turn signal! You go up and down the hills and hope you don't hit one of them. You have to be ever so careful and it just becomes a really big pain.

To think that used to be my way of transportation makes me shudder, now that I drive a car and see what it is like being the other driver.

bikini martini said...

I just recently stumbled onto your blog. Fantastic. Hope to see and read more soon. And as I always tell my boyfriend, drive safely ;-).

Learn that Poem said...

Recently, I was given the finger. I still don't know why. I was traveling west. The giver was traveling east. I slowed down so that I wouldn't be hit head on, while he was passing a car. In turn, he gave me a toothless, shirtless, raged look and the finger. ?

Anonymous said...

Gee Whiz! There are days when I wonder why I live in the deep dark boonies of the Great Commonwealth of Kentucky. Then I read things like this and say, Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! You know around here when someone may be driving too slow we usually just pass on by. The hand that comes out the window is just a wave with a smile. No hurry's, no worry's! When I go to the city thankfully there are people like you darlin'. Drive me around and I'll never be arrested for poking a guy's eye out with his own finger.

Anonymous said...

I just found your blog. You are one tough woman. Driving cab in NYC. You can always drive here in Nampa Idaho with 75,000 population. Easy driving out here just some rednecks.

nancy =) said...

well hey i'm from jersey but i drive like a cabbie from ny...i'm fast and furious...in my last life i drove the getaway car...and for total intimidation nothing beats a beemer...nothing...

peace...

meesh said...

I love the first picture! (sigh) god, I miss NYC. The buildings, the people, the cabbies, the fingers....

Anonymous said...

That first pic you took of the Empire state building looks freggin` awesome, especially when it is enlarged. Those clouds look evil.

MP, I wrote you before about maybe considering going to the day shift as it is less stressful than nights (less lunatics) but you never got back to me (do you even read these posts?).

Well anyway, I BEG you, STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM DAAYYYYS!!! It is freggin` absolutely insane now! The traffic is so bad I actually wrote Bloomberg a letter the other day and tried to talk to him today on WABC...

To make is brief what I said; You have this short strip of land called Manhattan, and you have every state in the union save for Hawaii and Alaska all thinking they can take a country drive of a vacation straight into this strip of land.

Without fail, I see license plates every week from every state you can imagine. And then you top that off with commuters who are insane enough to drive from New Jersey, Conneticut, Queens, Bronx, Brooklyn, Upstate NY, it`s too much!

I took home $40 freggin` bucks today, I couldn`t drive anybody anywhere! And then trying to avoid it all by staying on the upper west side, but eventually you always get some idiot who says "Take me to 59th and 2nd", usually at rush hour...Sure pal, if you don`t mind sitting in traffic for 3 freggin` hours!

SH*T, this city is gets worse everyday with the traffic situation and Bloomberg doesn`t one freggin` damn! It`s physically impossible to handle all these tourists, there is just not enough space. It`s nuts, as if the gas situation doesn`t kill enough, now I have to spend 10 zillion hours in traffic to make 5 bucks. And what the F**k is with the $20 bills? One after another all day..."$2.90 fare...here is a $20, give me $17 change" Dime tips because they think you are to blame for the traffic... "How dare you not know a secret way to bypass 100 square blocks of sheer iron clad gridlock"

Anonymous said...

I am working in NJ for a couple of weeks. It involves driving to two places a day to do computer work. I have to say I have been very happy with the drivers here. Although they do beep a lot...not at me, thankfully. Even when the traffic is heavy..it still moves pretty good...at least so far. =) Washington, DC is worse and the worst place of all is Miami. In Miami, you don't have to wonder IF they will cut you off..they WILL..count on it. So, here I am 15 miles from NYC and I am afraid to go there alone. Anyone know of a service that will pick me up and take me to Central Park and then drive me back to my hotel? I live in Daytona Beach.

Anonymous said...

That looks like Cary Grant and Deborah up there on top of the Empire State Building... Wait a minute... They're giving everyone the finger !

feather said...

Today I passed a tractor pulling a hay bailer going 20 mph. Here we always honk before passing, then each person gives a polite wave of " thank you" and move on. Everyone at work now is hooked on your blog but, we can't imagine living anywhere like NYC, you don't have the sun shining in from all directions, no wonder there are mean drivers there! lol

Joann said...

I want one too.

Sarah Jane said...

I love it! What a great idea! I'm a cyclist myself (29 years old and never learned how to drive if you can believe it) and want a sticker that says "my other bike is my boots"

Anonymous said...

nancy =) wrote:
...and for total intimidation nothing beats a beemer...

Ahem... a BMW with four wheels is a Bimmer. A Beemer is a BMW motorcycle.

Anyway, when I drive, I'm not intimated by any expensive cars, since my car is 16 years old and its exterior is in bad shape. (No crash damage or peeling paint, just a lot of scratches and scrapes and chips and dull spots.) The driver of an expensive car has a lot more to lose than I do should our vehicles make contact. MWA HA HA HA!

By the way, M.P.: The Exotic Erotic Ball [NSFW] is tonight at Pier 94 (54th St. & 12th Ave.). You might pick up some interesting fares there. Assuming you're not going to attend yourself.
:p

AtlasShrugs.com said...

woot. What an excellent crib you have here. We should blog NY events togeth -uh. whatev-uh.
Pamela

I'll be back

The Bee Lady said...

My apologies if I ever was in front of you, driving to slow, and yelling out the window:
"Sorry, I'm from Connecticut!"

Janet said...

May I add a comment to the LONG list you have off this post? I lived in The City for 7+ years and still miss the place. If I may, I'll link to your blog on mine and check it daily.

By the way, I found you through a comment on Gnightgirl's blog "This Just In".

Keep up the good work, and keep taking photos to make me feel less homesick...for a city which way my delightful but crazy adopted home for awhile.

Janet

(lordcelery.blogspot.com)

ingrid said...

I´m watching the Mundial de footbol.
My country made 6 "pepas" as teen ager say.
Usa is not doing well.
Right now is playing Brasil. You Yonkers don´t like football I belive you like beisbol. I love almost all sport but golf.
See you when the Mundial de football ends.
Be safe.

EverJack1 said...

I hate road rage, especially when I'm the target, and have done nothing wrong..... :o(

EverJack1

BAF said...

Hey MP you might like to know the following article made it into the International Business section of the the New Zealand Sunday Star times.... Scarry if the cabbies dont know it is happening...

Article by Julian Borger in Washington... Guardian

" Cabbies taught a lesson in fair play"

Agents from the NY DOI are posing as clueless tourists unable to speak English and took cabs from JFK to Manhattan and Brooklyn - the outcome was 50% of tourists had a chance of being 'ripped off'.Someone called Rose Gill the DOI's commissioner said the sting operations would continue... so go careful.

Keep up the good blog and can't wait for the book.

Anonymous said...

We here in Philly have no Idea what a turn singal is, can you explain what it does...:) We have found the horn though, and we use any chance we can. It reason why we use it does not really matter. Any reason will do, we love the horn.

Anonymous said...

BEEP BEEP YA ASS!

Whozfan said...

Dont forget even though it appeared that ther was just a woman in the car driving, there could have been three more people hiding in the car looking for trouble. And you stopping at a green light? Come on.

MJ06 said...

I agree with 000000 that cab has a kick ass licensplate fram. If I was a cabbie I would get a kick ass licens plate frame like that I like the skulls thats sweet.

High Power Rocketry said...

What does hack mean?

Anonymous said...

That is so funny. I'm from PA. and my girlfriend always asks me why I never use my turn signal. I don't have an answer.

Anonymous said...

Whats new about people slowing down & coming to a complete stop when the light is green? Happens all the time.

Anonymous said...

What ever happened to safe & sane. Now its : fast & reckless.

Anonymous said...

I want to be you because

1. I want to piss off the people at work by doing something as annoying as what you did to the lady and having the guts to do so.

2. You live in NYC.

You just rock!

Anonymous said...

You shouldn't feel bad about the inevitable irritation that some drivers evoke--- it doesn't just happen to cabbies- I try to be nice; you know, let people into my lane-even though I know they saw the "merge" sign a mile back. (I have done that myself- usually I play the dumb blonde routine and smile and shrug like I didn't know I was in a dead-end lane..LOL) What I HATE more than anything is when a driver doesn't acknowledge your courtesy- all I need is a small wave...just some sign that they appreciate me for letting them cut in front of me... Those people should know that I am only being nice because I don't want to create bad Karma---Ha Ha!! But, boy does it feel good to be a biatch every once in a while!

DANIELBLOOM said...

reading you in Taiwan!

http://nevertoolatetobegin.blogspot.com

TheWayfarer said...

I want a bumper sticker with a burning Confederate flag on the left that simply reads GO HOME JOHNNY REB!
If you think Jersey drivers suck, try circumnavigating hill/trailer trash drivers of all-beat-to-hell Dodges, living in midwestern states.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, New Jersey drivers are terrible. And I'm on my way to becoming one... I've seen many, many drivers ignore red lights, turn signals, pedestrians, etc. with or without using a cell phone. Thankfully, I can say that I won't be one of them when I get my license.

Anonymous said...

Funny thing is.. you don't own the road. Although most taxi drivers in this city think they do. I have been working and living in this city for over 20 years and i have to tell you that nyc city cab drivers are reckless, dangerous, inconciderate, rude and they follow almost no rules at all. They stop anywhere they want. Then have the nerve to layon the horn when someone is "too slow" or is waiting for someone to cross in front of them. Hey, weren't you the one a few blocks back that stopped in front of me and I waited for you. Now you're waiting for me.
I can't tell you how many hit pedestrians, cars into buildings and most recently(not the first time) smashed into the back of a NYC Fire truck (double) parked, I have gone to. My car has been hit three times by differant cab drivers who just drifted into my lane with no wanrning and I had no where to go.
I'm sure you make a lot more money when you drive faster and pay no attention to rules, but putting peoples lives in danger isn't worth the extra cash. Well at least not to the poor soul who is in your path.
NYC cab drivers should be forced to drive electric cars that can only go 35 miles an hour. This way they can't race each other from light to light, only to brake while wiating for the next light to turn green. It would help with polution and it was save countless lives and buildings. If the cab drivers don't make enough money, they can go back to where they came from and drive reclessly in there own countries

Anonymous said...

You can't even make left turns in NJ, no wonder they can't drive.

Anonymous said...

I saw a great sticker on a car here in the UK recently. It read, " I LOVE CATS.... they taste like chicken."